loving and believing.

For the past two years, i have been sharing my life with Alvin. It was never easy, when we don't belong to the same world. Sometimes, i've gotten used to it, most of the time, i haven't. Alvin studies music, mine is communications. Though we both want the best out of our chosen crafts, we deal with it differently. He is more focused, I, on the other hand, is playing with my emotions. I don't understand, but i see his life as something that is too complicated. A lot of things too do, with so little time. My life is simpler...and boring to be exact. As far as i can remember, i have been trying so hard to fit in, to share the same world with him. From time to time, i go out of my comfort zone to have a taste of his world, but still, i find myself lost in a world that's not my own. Alvin does the same, he seemed comfortable though, he always know how to belong. There are three things that i have to deal with this relationship. One, i am not his top priority, or at least not YET. Not anytine soon. Second, that he's not the usual boyfriend who is always on his way to check on me, my whereabouts, the people i'm with, etc. Lastly, he has a life that will go on with or without me. The first and the last are painful beyond compare, but as time went by, i had mastered from the heart. The second one, i'm still trying to adjust because i'm just not used to it. I was from a relationship where i have to report everything, and still was never enough. So am I happy with this relationship? YES. though i have lots of reasons to be fed up and call it quits with him, i also have countless of reasons to love him. Reasons that are just ordinary, but are very significant. I simply enjoy doing things with him. I love the fact that we can talk non stop about everything, from why north korea is a communist country, to why GREENPEACE is the coolest organization on earth next to PETA. weird? but fun. i love talking to him because he's not afraid to talk about what's on his mind. I also love it when we can be silent for awhile and be confident that there isnt anything wrong. I enjoy eating at an expensive restaurant with him and yet go crazy over our favorite squidballs the next day. I love calling him funny names and talk to him using our own lingo. words thats just between me and him. I always look forward to hanging out with him, to being with him. We may not have the best relationship, but who cares? I love it just how it is.